Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Stop trying to predict the outcome of my life.

on Monday, My brother called me with the asking if I had been looking for a job, when I told him no. He gave me the “This is why you need a job” speech.  at that point I just sat quietly as he talked the same stuff he asks every week.

With that said, I know I do need a job, I want a job too. but there are things that are blocking me from doing just that. I watch my nephew while my sister & brother n law works. he knows this.  When I told him that my sister was looking for nursery, she replied she cant afford a nursery”  .. This is the kind of stuff he does. He always talks as if he knows everyone's financial situations. therefore using it as an example while explaining to me why I need a job,

This Man says these words every week just about 

“Bruh, You Need a to start going out to look, because you can’t find a job on the internet, you have to go in person” 

WRONG! – But I just let him talk.. because from there he goes on to say this..

… “you can’t live with momma all your life,  what if you want a girlfriend and you wind up getting her pregnant, you can’t take care of a baby if you don’t have a job, and then she gonna put you on child support…”

See… He’d Babble on and on about everything I need to do. So that I wont have to live like other people that he claims he feels sorry for… That’s does not motivate me. it only makes me want to get away from this city. I can see it now, when I do get a job, they’ll be all in my business.

For me, I know what I need to do. I just don’t have the time to leave this house like i should.  and yeah, I have been procrastinating harshly. but its because of my everyday cycle that hasn’t changed. It’s partly and excuse yet all truth. 

Also. there are places I refuse to work, and those places are nearby. Mainly they’re all fast food places. .. it’s a job, but I don’t like dealing with money, and I don’t want to work around food.  Otherwise, Everyone i knows works at Wal-Mart and Lowes. that’s not always a good thing.

Generally though, I do have bills that i should be paying on my own, I haven’t had a real job since 2006, and that’s a bad thing. I don’t have much of what I want, to do as I please. That’s the real reason I need a Job.  I have felt like a failure since the time I quit school.. I have a debt with them too. That’s something else my brother likes to throw in my face.

.. As for me… The only way I can get away from it is to get a job at work my way out of everybody's demand.

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