Saturday, April 10, 2010

a little completion on that last entry

So It's like this, I'm looking at myself and It makes me feel huge. I know that I'm already 300 pounds. but the matter of seeing myself when standing around others is just crazy to me.

*Hold up* Seems like every time I start Blogging I get utterly distracted because somebody needs my services. .. smh

Okay, Now Back to The Basics...
I'm In a situation where it's extremely hard to lose weight. Why is that? There's no real food in this house ever. and it's not like I have the option to go to buy my own food.  It would get eaten by everyone else that walks through here.  I don't exercise at all. and even If I did it would only keep my weight Leveled. because of the way I eat.  It's hard to change eating habits where there's no concept of breakfast, lunch and dinner in this household now.

There's a way to stop, but because I'm always the one cooking. It's like I have no choice. My brother and Nephew don't know how to cook for themselves.. Nor do anything else in this house for themselves (they Expect me to be here to do that) .. Just watch when  I start leaving. They're gonna wonder why.

All I need is a good Mp3 player. A Book Sack, and a bottle of water. I could be gone for Hours.
Why a Bookbag? well I like to keep my cameras on me..LOL

But anyway.  That's how the process will begin. I have a plan. its just about doing it. The only complaints i know i'll be getting as that I'll Probably be Selfish when concerning things regarding this household ..

Being that I usually cook for everyone in the house. I may Stop that, if not. I'll probably cook lighter and do some hard stuff like eating in smaller portions. I know how to say NO to Fast food, the problem is that it comes in my house too often. and I Have to eat sometimes. But I'm tired of eating the same onld thing. .. I'm not referring to Fast Food as in McDonald's, Rally's or Burger King. I'm talking about Food That you're only supposed to have on Occasion. .. for example Every week we'd eat nachos, dot dogs or  that chicken from the gas station... I'm so tired of eating that stuff. but I'm always called to prepare it. That doesn't help with my cravings at all.

I've Always been big, but that's no excuse to be 300 pounds  or more.  We also have a broken scale in this house that I refuse to step on. I don't know who broke it but I know it's wrong because it shows me at the weight I was while living in Houston.

The sad part is that when i do eat, somebody has something to say. like when I make my own smoothies.. my dad would say "you're puttin' all that in there, I see why you're fat. you better stop that boy"... ..and i'm like SMH..  because Smoothies are a meal replacement and are way healthier. I could have a smoothie and not eat for a whole day...

Speaking of all of this.. I'm signing off. cause I'm hungry.
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