I sat in a group with my bother, sister and nephew,discussing the current status of our lives vs his life and hers. basically My nephew feels like we are Negative people because we are not successful he thinks that we are allow our situation to to hold us back. He was trying to offer us an option to join a program that he has interest in. but he couldn't come to grips with us declining. I think it's great that he has some things he's looking into. but I tried to tell him that He can't expect a Yes and a move right away without weighing life's situations.
Basically, his thoughts are a direct influence from his mom, who told him to not come around us because we are not people to look upto. and that we are negative people with negative energy. vs him who says he wants to be successful Now. I told him that he should always weigh his options though. The program he wants to do, he feels that its good money. Yeah great,. But He has given up on his current school, his current possible career in football which he claims he has no interest in. And he doesn't want to go to college because he believes its a waste of time and money./
With that said. Although I totally get how he feels about myself and my lil brother. I told him that Success won't come easy and that you can't go though life avoiding what you think are negative situations. you just have to deal with it and move on. I personally do things myself that get me by. but I am not a success and I know that.. Yet his mom has him under the impression that We (myself and my little brother) are Supposed to be baking 6 figures at this very moment. He feels that we were supposed to be the ones inspiring him to do better, not the other way around because that would be hypocritical because we are not successful. I told him. I get what he's saying, but He's not totally right. Our failure can be a prime example to why you should look at your options before you make moves. What are you willing to give up to make it to where you wanna be. and what are you doing to prep for the next thing. Now he doesn't really know that either. But he does have an Idea of what he wants to do. Yet when It happens and he moves into the situation. He will realize that he won't want to deal with the hardships of Not having the things he curently have, and not being able to do what he's currently doing.
He wants to go live with his dad, His dad lives in a different city with his girlfriend who works in an engineering field. This inspired my nephew to do the same after high school. to join a 2 year program and make that move. He's so interested that he Quit football because he figured it won't get him anywhere.. I told him that Football could get him into college on scholarship, he says "But I'll be forcd to play ball", I said, you;d have the funds for education though. He saus Still, He wants money now and school is a waste. I said Okay.. So Look at your current situation. You live in a house with your mom who's not there. but your house is dirty and you're not doing anything about it. Why? Because you want to avoid a negative situation, right? and because your mom yells at you for it, you want to leave the house, right? Okay. Totally avoiding the fact that you have to clean up a house that your mom owns and that you can live freely in, right? vs a situation where you will have to Harbor under someone elses roof, live by their rules and do exactly what they say or be forced on the streets... He's not thinking about that. But he told us "If I had an apartment I wouldn't let yall live with me" .. Well Okay. Do you understand that I can't work "Anywhere" because of my Medical condition? No. It's not a weight problem. it's a bone problem.
Understand the situation. Don't just say we are negative people because we are not like the guys in your circle who has parents who attended and graduated college with degrees and vs us who don't. you can't directly compare our situation to anyone elses because you don't understand what obstacles are there, you can't not avoid them.For the most part, my nephew is right. but he doesn't understand that everybody can't do as he thinks they could or should.
My Brother Ceion, on the other hand is deeply affected by his conditions, at this point. it's up to him. Don't be uncomfortably living in your comfort zone. You gotta believe that you can do it. Success won't come easy, nor will ir come from doing nothing. Yet we all can't just do something because You think we should. Do what you do. take care of yourself. It's all on you. don't worry about us. At the same time Deal with life,. don't try to avoid it.